Dear all at IPC,

One of the great struggles of the Christian life is when situations don’t change, when there is the realisation that unless God powerfully intervenes in an unusual way, things are pretty much what they are going to be for the rest of our lives. It is the problem of being stuck or feeling stuck.

It may be some flaw in our character, or a relationship, or a situation where we’ve prayed and prayed, we’ve sought help but still there is no change. There is the temptation to despair and to slip into deep discouragement. It can even  tragically lead to people giving up the Christian walk.

Someone recently said to me that it is the loss of hope that is the most difficult thing. Psalm 13 expresses it well in that famous question “How long O Lord?”. DA Carson in his book by that title begins by saying when it comes to suffering all you have to do is live long enough for if you’ve not experienced it yet, you soon will. I think the feeling of being in a situation that doesn’t change is a common experience for every believer at some point in their life . It would certainly seem that way from the Psalms. Psalm 40, 61, 121, 142 amongst others all deal directly or indirectly with this issue.

In fact scripture tells us that since the fall, God has hard wired frustration into his universe. Creation is subject to it (thorns and thistles effecting the ground – Romans 8:20); frustration is shown in the breakdown of relationship between people (enmity with each other); and we have frustration with ourselves – we are not the people we were created to be, there is conflict within us. That is certainly the testimony of every believer.

There are times in this fallen world when we feel we’ve exhausted every possible option. It feels like we are cornered and stuck.  The change that we might see is glacially slow and when it happens, it often hasn’t relieved the problem.

It is here the truth that God has ordered the times and seasons of our life may bring us some relief. In his sovereign providence we are where we are. We may well wish life was different, we may wish we hadn’t made the decisions we have made, but the situation we are in is not outside of his sovereign control.

The Apostle Paul knew something of frustration when he talked about “his thorn in the flesh” in 1 Corinthians 12.  Three times he pleaded with the Lord to remove it and yet the Lord’s answer was no and that his, ‘grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness’. God uses our frustrations, our difficulties, our heartbreak to show his power and his sufficiency. 

That doesn’t suddenly make everything ok and relieve every difficulty, but it does bring us comfort. The sorrow and pain might not be taken away but it does enable us to know this isn’t meaningless.

How do we react as believers when we feel we’re stuck? And when change doesn’t seem to be happening? I think we need to recognise where we live in redemptive history. God’s kingdom has come but it hasn’t fully come, we live in the now and the not yet. Jesus Christ has come but the curse of the fall and sin has not been fully removed. There is a day coming when frustration will be taken away, when the intractable problems of life will be done away with. In the words of Sam to Gandalf in the Lord of the Rings, “where everything sad will come untrue”.

There will be a new heaven and a new earth, God will dwell with man. Every relationship will give the joy that it was always meant to. The battles we face will be no more, frustration will be removed in its entirety. That is the hope. The New Testament teaches that we are being changed in this life, wonderfully, we’ve moved from death to life, from darkness to light, from blindness to sight. We are indwelt by God’s Spirit and he is changing us but the wonderful promise God gives us to us is that one day when we see him we shall be like him. That is the transformation we are looking for. There is hope, it won’t be like this forever. The Apostle Paul tells us that our citizenship is in heaven and from it we await a Saviour, the Lord Jesus Christ. We are a waiting people!

I think we also need to recognise God gives grace to the humble. It is very easy to feel hard done by, to think that we are the wronged party (and no doubt in lots of circumstances we are). But the tendency of my heart is often towards thinking I am some kind of victim. The command in scripture is to humble ourselves before God, it means admitting we have no rights. There are not demands we can place on God, there are no deals to be made with him. At our very best we’re unworthy servants and he does not treat us as we deserve. The incredible promise is that God gives grace to the humble (James 4:6) and that he lifts the humble up (James 4:10, 1 Peter 5:6). In a situation where we can feel stuck, one of the keys to handling that is seeing ourselves as we are, and God responds by giving grace. It is simple but that does not mean it is easy. I think seeing the alternative that scripture presents is very helpful – that if we are proud God will resist us.

Knowing that our times are in God’s hands and he is working out his purposes, knowing the hope of a new heavens and a new earth, knowing that God gives grace to the humble, we can do the right thing. It won’t be like this forever and God’s grace will be sufficient until then.

Elizabeth Elliot popularised an old poem – ‘Do the next thing’

Do it immediately, do it with prayer;
Do it reliantly, casting all care;
Do it with reverence, tracing His hand
Who placed it before thee with earnest command.
Stayed on Omnipotence, safe ‘neath His wing,
Leave all results, do the next thing.

My experience is that when you are feeling overwhelmed and stuck, the temptation for paralysis is enormous. Recognising the truth about God and about ourselves can help us just to do the next thing, to do the right thing.

Don’t give up,

your Minister and friend,

Paul